Parents make an oath to protect your child in every situation, the minute they were born. Then they send their kids to school and hope the strangers they meet will be nice to their beloved ones. Once the child is out of home, there is very little a parent can do to protect them. They might be facing bullying also.
According to a survey conducted by care.com, parents have revealed that their kids being bullied is one of their greatest fears.1 in 4 kids is being bullied in US every month, around 160,000 kids does not attend their classes in the fear of being bullied. 1 in 10 students actually drops out due to bullying.
What is bullying?
Bullying is mental or physical abuse which is done intentionally and repeatedly. It might occur in the form of physical bullying (pushing, poking, hitting etc), verbal bullying (name calling, taunting etc) or cyber bullying (sending hurtful texts, spends rumours online etc) or in the combination of these.
How to find if your child is being bullied?Try answering the following questions with either yes or no.
- Does your child avoid any topic related to his/her school?
- Do you have to force your child to take part in school activities or to play with their friends?
- Is your child reluctant to go to school?
- Do they have any unexplainable bruises or injuries?
- Are they angry or sullen most of the time? And ask to be left alone?
- Are they showing any distress like stomachache or headache?
- Have they started asking for more lunch money without a proper explanation?
- Did your child’s academic performance drop all of a sudden?
If your answer is ‘yes’ to most of the questions, yes! your child is being bullied.Here is something a parent could ask their child to do.
Be open about bullying There are situations when children think it is necessary to get bullied or feel ashamed about being bullied. Educate them about bullying and make sure their rights.
Social behaviour Always remember home is the first school, children always learn what they see in their parents, so make sure providing them a positive home they deserve.
Coach them by roleplaying Train them how to get away without being bullied. The best strategy is always to not show the emotions a bully is expecting them to show.
The bystander What if your child is not being bullied? Being a witness of bullying is also equally bad. Teach your child to help the kid being bullied by getting an adult help.
But, what about the parent of a bully? People always question the parenting of a bully-kid. And let us admit it, no parent would like to believe that their wonderful sweet child is a bully. It is always better to know what your child is upto.
Here are few questions which might help you in determining, if your child is a bully.
- Are they intolerant about few kids in their class who are different?
- Do they like hurting animals?
- Are they worried about staying popular in class?
- Do they find pleasure in hurting other kids?
- Are they the first to attack in confrontations?
If you understand from these questions that your child “might be” a bully, here are some things you can do as a parent to bring them out of this mindset.
Have a conversation It is important to let your child know, whatever theyare doing is wrong. Make them understand what it feels like to be bullied by roleplaying. Ask them questions like “What if someone did the same thing to you?”
Intention or disability? Some kids with disabilities bully others to feel better about themselves. It is better to make sure if the bullying is either intentional or because of a disability. Emotional or behavioural bullying can always be tackled by Individualized Education Program (IEP).
Patience Though the bullying behaviour cannot be corrected overnight, you can always try to replace one bad behaviour with a good one. Have patience and wait for the change, when you see it make sure you appreciate it.
Emotions The main problem found in most of the bully kids is that they have a very little or no awareness about how people feel upon being bullied. Make sure they realise others’ emotions matters too.
Model parent Show your child the act of kindness by helping your neighbours. Teach them how to get out of tussles without bullying or fighting. Make sure they are not dealing with any anger or frustration or depressions. If yes, teach them how to deal with them and appreciate them when they are successful.
Following are few more articles that might be help you in dealing with your child’s bullying behaviour.
